School Test Anxiety: Strategies for Parents

State and end-of-the-year testing starts today— and with that comes a mix of emotions. Maybe your child is feeling confident and ready—fantastic! Or maybe they’re starting to feel the pressure—that’s totally normal, too. Test anxiety is a common experience for many kids and teens, and it can impact both academic performance and emotional well-being.

Test anxiety can show up in a variety of ways. Some kids may openly express their worries, while others may experience physical symptoms like stomachaches, headaches, or trouble sleeping. Around this time of year, a child who usually enjoys school might suddenly start resisting going. The good news is that these symptoms are manageable with the right support.

What Is Test Anxiety?

Test anxiety is defined as excessive worry before or during a test that affects performance. Symptoms typically fall into three categories:

• Emotional: fear, self-doubt, or irritability

• Physical: headaches, stomachaches, sweating, rapid heartbeat

• Behavioral: avoidance of school, procrastination, negative self-talk

What Causes Test Anxiety?

There are several reasons why a child might feel anxious about tests:

• Pressure to perform – This can be self-imposed or unintentionally communicated by adults. Even well-meaning encouragement can create pressure if it feels like an expectation to be perfect.

• Perfectionism – Some kids set extremely high standards for themselves, and the fear of falling short can be overwhelming.

• Fear of disappointing others – Worrying about letting down parents or teachers can intensify anxiety.

• Lack of confidence or preparation – Feeling unprepared or unsure can make tests seem intimidating.

How to Help: Strategies That Work

The good news is, there are effective ways to support your child. Here are some simple, practical strategies:

1. Normalize Their Feelings

Let your child know that it’s okay to feel nervous. You might say, “It’s totally normal to feel a little anxious before a test. That just means you care—and you’re not alone.”

2. Validate and Encourage

Show empathy and offer encouragement. Try saying, “I see that you’re feeling nervous, and that makes sense. I believe in you—you’ve worked hard and you’re capable.”

3. Teach Relaxation Techniques

Breathing exercises are a great first step. Teach your child to pause and take five deep breaths when they begin to feel overwhelmed. This helps calm the nervous system and bring focus.

4. Practice Mindfulness: The 5 Senses Exercise

This grounding activity helps kids stay present by engaging with their environment. Ask them to pause and identify:

• 5 things they can see

• 4 things they can hear

• 3 things they can feel

• 2 things they can smell

• 1 thing they can taste

This simple mindfulness tool can ease racing thoughts and bring calm.

5. Promote Positive Self-Talk

Help your child reframe negative thoughts. For example:

• “I’m going to fail” → “I’ve prepared, and I’ll do my best.”

• “I’m bad at math” → “I’m learning, and I can improve.”

You can also create short affirmations together for them to repeat before a test, such as, “I am calm and capable,” or “I can handle hard things.”

6. Establish Healthy Routines

Support your child with habits that reduce anxiety:

• Break study time into small, manageable chunks

• Encourage physical activity to release stress

• Prioritize a healthy diet and plenty of sleep

• Limit screen time before bed to improve rest

Test anxiety is common—but it doesn’t have to be overwhelming. With validation and healthy habits, kids can build confidence and learn to navigate test situations with greater ease. Be patient and encouraging—these are skills that take time, but they are absolutely worth developing.

Written by Chrissy Huffman, Candidate for Masters in Marriage and Family Therapy.