Tips to Help Your Child with ADHD Get Ready for School Every Morning in 2023

Mornings are stressful even for us as adults. For neurodivergent children, these mornings can be incredibly anxiety-inducing and overwhelming. They may forget things, get distracted, lose track of time, and more. Unfortunately, for your child with ADHD, these mornings before school can reinforce negative self-talk and thoughts such as “I’m always late” or “I forget everything” or even “I’m a burden”.

So how can we help reduce stress and create a more positive experience for both your child and yourself?

Keep a Consistent Sleep Routine – We all know the importance of getting enough sleep and for our neurodivergent children sleep can be difficult. It is crucial to try and stick to a bedtime and wake-up routine as much as possible. Structure and schedule are extremely beneficial for neurodivergent children (and children in general). Allow time for your child to move and get energy out before going to bed, make sure there are no screens close to bedtime, and allow space for the two of you to wind down together before going to sleep if possible. If your current routine is working, perfect! Small adjustments can be really beneficial, and checking in with your child can help. There will still be difficult nights, but continuing to stick with a schedule and routine will create structure.

Nature, Movement, and Play – Research continues to show how beneficial play and getting outside in nature can be for children. It has been shown to help with attention, lowering anxiety, and overall mood. They are able to have freedom and expression through play outdoors, allowing their creativity and imagination to run wild. Movement is incredibly important for all people, but especially for children as they are developing. Not only are they engaging their muscles and bodies, but also their minds. Movement is especially helpful for children with ADHD, allowing for release of energy and reduction of stress. Play is critical for children. It helps to map neural passageways, build confidence, and work through emotions. Creating time in your child’s schedule for play can help with sleep, attention, and overall regulation.

Give More Wake Up Time – In the morning, allow for more time than usual to get ready for school, as kids (and adults) with ADHD can have trouble managing time. Allow space and time for your child to get ready for school without being rushed, this will lower your stress levels, as well as your child’s. When you decide on a schedule for the morning before school, it is helpful to create a visual schedule that your child is able to check in on and reference. This can also be an activity that you and your child do together! They can decorate or color, and they can add input into the schedule which can help with building confidence and fueling independence. This will also limit surprises and help with structure.

Make Breakfast Easy – While we are always told breakfast is the most important meal of the day, don’t stress if your child is not wanting it. Something as small as a breakfast bar or an Ensure as they are heading out the door can be helpful. Anything that is easy to eat or drink on the go is going to help with getting out the door much more smoothly. If meal prep is something that you and your family do at the beginning of the week, meal-prepping breakfast tacos or some scrambled eggs in little to-go containers can also be helpful to have in the morning. Some other portable breakfast items include smoothies, yogurt, diced fruit, Ensure shakes, and breakfast bars.

If your child is taking ADHD medication, more focus may need to be placed on having a large breakfast as stimulant medications can decrease appetite cues throughout the day

Autonomy – As you are creating your schedule, routine, and making decisions on breakfast, remember to include your child in this! The amount of responsibility may depend on the age and developmental level of your child but involving them can be empowering and will help with the child sticking to it. This way, you are also talking through the plan with your child in advance so they know what the morning is going to look like.

Give Choices – If your child needs to wake up at 7, and really struggles with waking up, you can wake them up at 6:45 and if they want to sleep a little longer, give them the choice of waking up in 5 more minutes or 10 more minutes. They will still be getting up with time to spare and they will have made a decision. When picking breakfast foods, sit with them in the grocery store and have them decide on options for that week. If you decide to meal prep the night before, have them help by cutting strawberries or something else so they are involved. When creating the nighttime routine of getting ready for bed, decide together in what order they want to do things, maybe they want to brush their teeth before putting on their PJs. Everything is still getting done but the child is able to develop autonomy and feels empowered by making decisions.

As you are creating a schedule for your child, remember that this might be a big change for them. Small successes are celebrations and encouragement, high-fives, or a “Wow! You did that!” can mean a lot. External motivation and rewards for completing tasks can also be beneficial. Whether that’s stickers on a board, their favorite snacks or food, or even a point system working towards bigger rewards, it can help your child buy into the new system.

Remember to regulate yourself – Our children are sponges. They soak up so much more than we realize from body language, tone of voice, and general attitude. Remember that even if you are feeling stressed in the morning, take a minute if you need to re-center yourself. As you are able to regulate your emotions and anxiety, it will help your child regulate their own. If you are frustrated, try to continue using a calm and relaxed tone, especially with little ones, as yelling could cause heightened anxiety and set y’all back even further.

These mornings may not always go the way that we want them to. There are going to be bad mornings with breakdowns, crying, and maybe yelling. But everything that you are doing to better support your child makes a difference. Our goal is not to completely take away bad mornings because that is impossible, but it is to reduce your stress and your child’s and increase the number of good mornings. Remember that you are already working hard to support your child, even by reading this! And that effort alone is important. Small adjustments can have big impacts!

ADHD testing for your child is available. Learn more here.

Written by Gracen Kelly, Candidate for Masters in Clinical Mental Health Counseling